I was having a leisurely lunch last week with the latest copy of Vogue on the side for some inspiration. An article with the title “Who do YOU dress for?” caught my attention. It’s a clever, light-hearted piece with lots of plugs for latest trends and designer names, as one would expect from Vogue.As I continued reading, something inside me woke up, it was not a good feeling. What upset me was this idea that women dress to impress others, if it’s not men, then it’s their girlfriends. It reinforced an old (and I feel really outdated) fashion cliche that women can either dress in sexy feminine clothes to get male attention and approval or they can wear some latest trend or high fashion item that gets them a nod of approval from their girlfriends (who it is assumed are equally fashion conscious).
What if it’s neither? What if a woman could dress to feel good, to express herself, not to impress others?
To be fair, the article did mention that dressing for yourself is what ultimately matters most. But it was assumed here that when a woman is dressing for herself, it means she is wearing the latest trends or some off-putting for men item that only fashion conscious girlfriends would understand.
* Image taken from www.thedatingtruth.com
I don’t know about you, but I find this view very limiting. As a woman who dresses to express who I am, to honour myself, I rarely (if ever) consider how trendy my outfit is and whether it is a man repeller or attractor. If I want to be attractive to others, I need to feel attractive first.
The Vogue article can be easily dismissed (what’s the big deal anyway?) and yet, on some level, it reflects the way women are seen today: needing to impress, get approval, showing one side of you to your girlfriends and another side to your man, adjusting ourselves according to situations and roles. This is tiring. It makes us forget who we truly are. Isn’t it time we stopped trying to put multidimensional, unique women into boxes and accepted that our style needs to be an expression of who we are?
Isn’t it time we shifted away from the idea of “dressing to impress”?
Worrying about impressing others takes our power away. I have been there myself and I have witnessed many women struggle with this.
So going back to the main question – “who do you dress for?”… It may seem that the “correct” answer should be “for myself”. And yes, that’s the first person each of us requires to consider when dressing. But I invite you to consider that the question itself may be unnecessary and outdated. What it really asks is who do you want to impress when you dress.
I believe it is time we moved from impressing to expressing who we are, our uniqueness, our mood, our complex nature. So instead of “Who to I dress for?” ask yourself “Who do I want to express today? What kind of woman I am today?”
How would this feel?
If you are struggling to define the woman you are today, if you are tired of playing the impressing game, if you have lost a sense of who you truly are because life is so busy on the outside, then I would like to invite you to discuss these questions together in an intimate luxurious away from daily routine environment.
On 19th March I am hosting a one-day intimate event in central London for 10 women who are ready to go deeper within to discover who they are and to see themselves in a way they have not dared to see before.
Further details can be found here.
You can register your interest by signing up here and myself or a team member will be in touch to tell you more and answer your questions.
